Caveman Theories
Once upon a time, a few thousand years ago (or less if you don't believe the world is that old) there were 4 cavemen sitting around discussing the world around them.
One man pointed to a rock which had a hole in the top. Filling this hole was water. He said to the other men, "I wonder why the water stays in the rock instead of leaving."
The oldest man, Bob, suggested "Well I think the water is being pulled downward, towards the earth, so it stays in the stone because it would have to go up to escape it."
The other men thought for a bit, but not wanting to seem dumber than the old man, decided to create their own theories:
Charles) "The water is attracted to the stone and doesn't want to leave"
Greg) "The water enjoys being inside holes and doesn't want to leave"
Simon) "An invisible monster from the ocean decides where the water should go, and currently that hand has decided the water should be in the stone"
Hmmm... so many theories. The cave men sat around and argued about the merits of their theories. None of them could be disproven by looking at the water in the stone.
Bob went over and grabbed the stone and brought it back to the group. He then turned the stone over and watched the water pour out. This caused Greg to give up his theory of water liking holes. "It was a dumb theory anyway. I think I should adopt one of yours." He asked the other men to explain why the water had poured out of the hole.
Bob explained that the water was still being pulled down and when the rock was turned upside down the water fell out. Charles explained that when the stone was turned over the water saw that the earth is a huge stone and decided to find a crack in the earth to hide in. Simon explained that the monster of the ocean decided that the water should leave the stone.
Greg decided all the theories seemed to work so he chose the last one. He figured that if the ocean hand existed he'd better believe in it or it would smite him and steal all his water.
This infuriated Bob. He was certain that his theory was far better than the other two. To prove it he decided to have a competition. Since the three theories all explained the behavior of water he wanted each man to devise a way to move water from the nearby lake to their cave near the top of a mountain.
Bob grabbed a large piece of wood and began hollowing it out. He figured it would make a nice lightweight container.
Charles grabbed a similarly large rock and began hollowing it out. It was much harder, and would be much heavier to carry, but he figured it must be a large rock or when the water saw the mountain it would travel to the cracks in the cave.
Greg now turned to Simon and asked, "How are you going to make the ocean monster move water to the cave?" Simon pondered for a second and then replied, "We can gain the ocean monster's favor by giving it a sacrifice!" So he took Greg back to their cave and they came back with all of their prettiest jewelry.
"Give me your jewels!" Simon demanded.
"But why?"
"Because if you don't you'll make the ocean monster mad!"
"But why should I give it to you instead of the monster himself?"
"Because the monster told me that I should take items on its behalf!"
"Oh"
Simon then threw Greg's jewelry into the lake.
Greg ran into the water to retrieve it but Simon stopped him. "You'll anger the ocean monster! I'll go see if he accepted your sacrifice." Simon jumped into the lake and fished around for the jewelry. They were of course just sitting at the bottom, but not wanting his theory to appear stupid he hid them in his hand. "It appears that the monster has taken your jewels! Now your wish will be granted!"
Greg turned to stare up at the cave and wait for water to magically fly up to it. "Where's the water?" he asked.
"Why it's already up there. The ocean monster moves faster than you can see."
"So can we go up and see it"
"Do you doubt the ocean monster? If you do he'll punish you by reversing his gift and removing the water. You must believe the water is there or it will not be there!"
Around this time Bob and Charles finished their containers and both filled them in the lake. Charles couldn't move very fast and stopped for a break but Bob started up towards the mountain cave.
"Can you check if the water is there, Bob?" Greg asked.
"If Bob enters the cave then the ocean monster will remove it's water because Bob is a non-believer. We must convince Bob and Charles to join our ocean monster revering. The ocean monster has said so!"
Charles took another two steps with his large stone before collapsing for another rest. "Can your ocean monster really move water without forcing us to carry large stones?"
"Of course! But you must not doubt the monster or he will undo his work and will punish you!" Simon replied.
Bob returned from his pleasant hike on the mountain (made more pleasant by having some water to drink) a few hours later and found Greg and Charles standing in the ocean reciting everything Simon chanted: "The ocean monster is all powerful! The ocean monster will destroy us if don't believe in it! The ocean monster demands the we give our jewels to Simon that he may sacrifice them!"
"Do you really believe what Simon is saying? Why are you giving him your jewels?" Bob asked.
"If I don't believe, the ocean monster will punish me" Greg relied.
"The ocean monster can perform miracles like moving water without carrying large stones. I must make my sacrifices to it so I can ask it for favors." Charles added.
"But I can move water without stones and I don't believe in the ocean monster. How do you explain that?"
"The ocean monster is using Bob as a test. The monster carries the water for him, and makes him say these things. You must not believe Bob or the ocean monster will punish you!" Simon quickly yelled.
"But if you two would just help me make some large wooden containers we could carry water from the lake to our cave and then we could drink without having to walk all the way back to the lake. Wouldn't that be great?"
"Do not fall for his promises! Only the great ocean monster can move water! Only by sacrificing your jewels will you have water to drink in the cave!"
"Ok, listen, I'll take some water up to the cave myself. If you like it, then maybe someday you can come down here and use one of my containers to bring water up to the cave."
"The ocean monster has made Bob's water poisonous. If you drink it he will punish you. You must wait until the ocean monster decides you are worthy of water. Only then will he bring it to you. The ocean monster is now telling me that we must sacrifice Bob. Quickly help me throw him into the sea!!!"
====
It sounds funny when people are arguing about the theory of gravity. Unfortunately when it comes to the theory of evolution people still think there's a debate.
Gravity is only a theory, but we use it do everything from build buildings to space flight. Gravity is a useful idea not because we can prove it (we can't) but because we can use it to predict how things will behave. This lets us invent all the things that make up modern life.
Evolution has also provided us with thousands of advances. From advanced agriculture to combating genetic diseases our civilization is founded on the findings of Evolution. This is a field that is growing exponentially in possibilities and there is a interminable shortage of scientists.
And yet even today there are people demanding the teaching of alternate theories. Theories such as Intelligent Design can never be proven wrong since they allow anything to happen. Where this theory fails is not in its facts, but in the scientific method. It doesn't allow you to make hypotheses, it doesn't allow fact checking, and most importantly it doesn't allow us to make predictions. Predictions let us invent things. Inventions drive civilization.
Next time someone is arguing for teaching Intelligent Design in school don't try to defend the facts of Evolution. Point out how Intelligent Design is not a scientific theory. Reducing the teaching of Evolution in school doesn't just hurt Evolutionists, it slows down scientific progress and prevents everyone from benefiting from its discoveries.
One man pointed to a rock which had a hole in the top. Filling this hole was water. He said to the other men, "I wonder why the water stays in the rock instead of leaving."
The oldest man, Bob, suggested "Well I think the water is being pulled downward, towards the earth, so it stays in the stone because it would have to go up to escape it."
The other men thought for a bit, but not wanting to seem dumber than the old man, decided to create their own theories:
Charles) "The water is attracted to the stone and doesn't want to leave"
Greg) "The water enjoys being inside holes and doesn't want to leave"
Simon) "An invisible monster from the ocean decides where the water should go, and currently that hand has decided the water should be in the stone"
Hmmm... so many theories. The cave men sat around and argued about the merits of their theories. None of them could be disproven by looking at the water in the stone.
Bob went over and grabbed the stone and brought it back to the group. He then turned the stone over and watched the water pour out. This caused Greg to give up his theory of water liking holes. "It was a dumb theory anyway. I think I should adopt one of yours." He asked the other men to explain why the water had poured out of the hole.
Bob explained that the water was still being pulled down and when the rock was turned upside down the water fell out. Charles explained that when the stone was turned over the water saw that the earth is a huge stone and decided to find a crack in the earth to hide in. Simon explained that the monster of the ocean decided that the water should leave the stone.
Greg decided all the theories seemed to work so he chose the last one. He figured that if the ocean hand existed he'd better believe in it or it would smite him and steal all his water.
This infuriated Bob. He was certain that his theory was far better than the other two. To prove it he decided to have a competition. Since the three theories all explained the behavior of water he wanted each man to devise a way to move water from the nearby lake to their cave near the top of a mountain.
Bob grabbed a large piece of wood and began hollowing it out. He figured it would make a nice lightweight container.
Charles grabbed a similarly large rock and began hollowing it out. It was much harder, and would be much heavier to carry, but he figured it must be a large rock or when the water saw the mountain it would travel to the cracks in the cave.
Greg now turned to Simon and asked, "How are you going to make the ocean monster move water to the cave?" Simon pondered for a second and then replied, "We can gain the ocean monster's favor by giving it a sacrifice!" So he took Greg back to their cave and they came back with all of their prettiest jewelry.
"Give me your jewels!" Simon demanded.
"But why?"
"Because if you don't you'll make the ocean monster mad!"
"But why should I give it to you instead of the monster himself?"
"Because the monster told me that I should take items on its behalf!"
"Oh"
Simon then threw Greg's jewelry into the lake.
Greg ran into the water to retrieve it but Simon stopped him. "You'll anger the ocean monster! I'll go see if he accepted your sacrifice." Simon jumped into the lake and fished around for the jewelry. They were of course just sitting at the bottom, but not wanting his theory to appear stupid he hid them in his hand. "It appears that the monster has taken your jewels! Now your wish will be granted!"
Greg turned to stare up at the cave and wait for water to magically fly up to it. "Where's the water?" he asked.
"Why it's already up there. The ocean monster moves faster than you can see."
"So can we go up and see it"
"Do you doubt the ocean monster? If you do he'll punish you by reversing his gift and removing the water. You must believe the water is there or it will not be there!"
Around this time Bob and Charles finished their containers and both filled them in the lake. Charles couldn't move very fast and stopped for a break but Bob started up towards the mountain cave.
"Can you check if the water is there, Bob?" Greg asked.
"If Bob enters the cave then the ocean monster will remove it's water because Bob is a non-believer. We must convince Bob and Charles to join our ocean monster revering. The ocean monster has said so!"
Charles took another two steps with his large stone before collapsing for another rest. "Can your ocean monster really move water without forcing us to carry large stones?"
"Of course! But you must not doubt the monster or he will undo his work and will punish you!" Simon replied.
Bob returned from his pleasant hike on the mountain (made more pleasant by having some water to drink) a few hours later and found Greg and Charles standing in the ocean reciting everything Simon chanted: "The ocean monster is all powerful! The ocean monster will destroy us if don't believe in it! The ocean monster demands the we give our jewels to Simon that he may sacrifice them!"
"Do you really believe what Simon is saying? Why are you giving him your jewels?" Bob asked.
"If I don't believe, the ocean monster will punish me" Greg relied.
"The ocean monster can perform miracles like moving water without carrying large stones. I must make my sacrifices to it so I can ask it for favors." Charles added.
"But I can move water without stones and I don't believe in the ocean monster. How do you explain that?"
"The ocean monster is using Bob as a test. The monster carries the water for him, and makes him say these things. You must not believe Bob or the ocean monster will punish you!" Simon quickly yelled.
"But if you two would just help me make some large wooden containers we could carry water from the lake to our cave and then we could drink without having to walk all the way back to the lake. Wouldn't that be great?"
"Do not fall for his promises! Only the great ocean monster can move water! Only by sacrificing your jewels will you have water to drink in the cave!"
"Ok, listen, I'll take some water up to the cave myself. If you like it, then maybe someday you can come down here and use one of my containers to bring water up to the cave."
"The ocean monster has made Bob's water poisonous. If you drink it he will punish you. You must wait until the ocean monster decides you are worthy of water. Only then will he bring it to you. The ocean monster is now telling me that we must sacrifice Bob. Quickly help me throw him into the sea!!!"
====
It sounds funny when people are arguing about the theory of gravity. Unfortunately when it comes to the theory of evolution people still think there's a debate.
Gravity is only a theory, but we use it do everything from build buildings to space flight. Gravity is a useful idea not because we can prove it (we can't) but because we can use it to predict how things will behave. This lets us invent all the things that make up modern life.
Evolution has also provided us with thousands of advances. From advanced agriculture to combating genetic diseases our civilization is founded on the findings of Evolution. This is a field that is growing exponentially in possibilities and there is a interminable shortage of scientists.
And yet even today there are people demanding the teaching of alternate theories. Theories such as Intelligent Design can never be proven wrong since they allow anything to happen. Where this theory fails is not in its facts, but in the scientific method. It doesn't allow you to make hypotheses, it doesn't allow fact checking, and most importantly it doesn't allow us to make predictions. Predictions let us invent things. Inventions drive civilization.
Next time someone is arguing for teaching Intelligent Design in school don't try to defend the facts of Evolution. Point out how Intelligent Design is not a scientific theory. Reducing the teaching of Evolution in school doesn't just hurt Evolutionists, it slows down scientific progress and prevents everyone from benefiting from its discoveries.
posted by Ze Ace at
5:04 PM
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